I always enjoy writing these stories, and I especially enjoy the odd, silly ones. Every once in a while I try little experiments with the chapters...just to see how they might turn out. This chapter is just such an experiment...enough of one, in fact, that it requires this introductory paragraph. And yes, I generally begin chapters with an introductory paragraph or two..but in all honesty, that's just because I'm long-winded; not because they are necessarily necessary. Without giving away too much of the story, I'm just going to tell you there's going to be lots and lots of dialogue in this chapter, which is to say this chapter will be very dialogue-driven. So to make this process more efficient, I'm going to color code the words rather than using all the "He said," "Then she replied," etc stuff. Those of you that have read previous chapters will know I generally use a green text (like the one I'm using as I type this), so I'm going to continue using that same color for general story-telling segments throughout this chapter. The dialogue for the parts spoken by our characters will be coded as follows:
Kev will speak in Purple
My beautiful gatekeeper, Madeleine, the Albino Peacock (Peahen) will speak in White
Kev with a turtle on his shoulder will speak in Orange
Dee-Dee the Turtle (upon Kev's shoulder) will speak in Blue
Both Cousin Eddie's will speak in Red
Olga the bartender fairy will speak in Yellow
Edwin the Bee will speak in the same Green as the general story-telling segments
So a final note before we get on with the chapter: if you're reading this chapter, it's likely you're reading it on a mobile device which means ALL the text will appear black with a white background. I will try to make the dialogue the least confusing as I can without using quotations. However, if you want to change this, simply scroll to the very bottom of the page and select "WEB" instead of the "MOBILE" that it defaults to. Then it will display all the text colors with a black background. To change it back again (if you have chosen to do so) scroll all the way to the very bottom of the page again (the very last line on the far right beneath the banner) and select "MOBILE SITE." Anyway, thank you all for being a part of this journey, and let's get on with the story!.......
My return to my Sacred Garden after a lengthy journey started out usual enough. Everything looked the same as I had remembered. My beautiful gatekeeper, Madeleine, was busy upon Achilles' Last Stand typing away on her laptop. Of course I should have known right away that something very strange was about to happen when I greeted Edwin the Bee upon entering, and He only chuckled at me. For whatever reason, that thought never entered my consciousness, however. I suppose I just chalked it up to Edwin being actually happy to see me again since I was gone for so long. Now that I type this, it becomes painfully clear just how foolish it was for me to chalk up such a thing! I can be very dense at times. *sigh*
Ahoy there, my beautiful gatekeeper! Beautiful as ever!
Oh, hey there Kev! I've been so wrapped up with these postings to the Andrew forum for the fairies, that I didn't even catch you sneaking past me! I see you've found a new friend!
Yes indeed! Isn't she gorgeous? This is Dee-Dee the Turtle. We found each other by the bank of my lovely sister the River just past the border to Flatlandia. She was looking for a purpose, and helped me to realize that I also have been searching for a purpose. So we just sort of hit it off right away.
Gorgeous indeed! It's nice to meet you, Dee-Dee. Kale chip?
Oh, yes! I love kale chips! Thank you. Mmm...delicious. You are every bit as beautiful of a gatekeeper as Kev said you were. And your sacred garden is even more stunning than I imagined it.
Well, thank you, gorgeous Dee-Dee. And welcome to our beloved Xanadu Forest. And Kev, why didn't you tell me about Dee-Dee before? You know you shouldn't be hiding your relationships from your gatekeeper...kind of hard to gatekeep that way, you know?
Well I just got here, Madeleine. I suppose I could've messaged you from the Casio communicator watch to warn you, but I didn't think it was so important that it couldn't wait until I returned.
But you said you found each other in Flatlandia. Even at your most motivated, which is not that motivated, I should add...you wouldn't be able to make it to Flatlandia and back in a single sun-greeting. A rabbit and a hare indeed, haha!
Who said anything about a single sun-greeting, beautiful gatekeeper? I've been gone for many sun and moon-greetings...as I would expect you to know. So many that I've lost count. And why are all the garden gate activity logs already signed off on? There should be a whole stack of them for me to sign off on.
I can attest to that, beautiful Madeleine...I've been traveling with Kev for at least a few sun and moon-greetings.
Is this some sort of prank, Kev? If it is, it's not funny. I've got a lot of work to catch up on, you know. The Andrew forums have blown up like crazy since the Fabupalooza concert in Lustra. And thank you for all the pictures you took for me, by the way. The fairies are so in love with me now! So can we end the prank now? And I can get back to the forums, and you can get back to doing whatever it is Kev's do when they're actually doing something? Please? And here, have a kale chip. Just made a fresh batch--lemon pepper with honey.
I swear, Madeleine, there's no prank here--or if there is, I'm not in on it. I'm at least as confused as you are, beautiful gatekeeper. Really. And mmm...these are delicious! Only YOU could get me to eat kale chips! Wait a minute!!!...did you say Fabupalooza?!! I haven't been to the Fabupalooza concert! I was waiting to hear back from Yana for when we would go. When did I supposedly give you pictures I took at Fabupalooza?
A few sun-greetings ago. Kev, something is seriously wrong here. Unless you're messing with me! I'm totally serious now, Kev...if this is a joke, you need to tell me right now. Because if it's not a joke, we have a major problem on our hands.
I can't swear enough...I'm thoroughly confused, Madeleine. Yes, something is majorly wrong here. This is so not good.
Do you guys think someone is impersonating Kev?
Either that, or something has gone wrong from when Tick-Tock Doc and I created a time machine and accidentally invented time. But we destroyed all the time machines and sent all the Kev's and Cousin Eddie's back to their proper timelines. Or so we believed. Either way, it's a really bad thing.
Wait!!! Time machines? Plural, as in more than one?!! And ALL the Kev's and Cousin Eddie's?!! And how come I've never heard of this incident? And boy, when you foul things up you really foul things up, don't you?! Exactly how many Kev's and Cousin Eddie's were there?
Honestly, I can't remember how many...but I think there were like 12 or 13 of us--each-- here in the Xanadu Forest...at its peak. It's a long story, but basically it happened like you said, Madeleine...when we foul things up we really foul things up. We realized our mistake right off and kept traveling back to a point before we invented time by accident. But we kept messing up, not realizing that each time we used the time machine, we were sort of copying and pasting another of us into our timeline. It was a design flaw...and that's Tick-Tock Doc's fault, not mine! Just saying. All this happened before you were my beautiful gatekeeper. You were just the county clerk when all this went down.
That sounds like a complete and utter disaster you had going!
Oh, you have no idea, Dee-Dee! Kev and his companions are capable of the most epic of disastrous situations. Wait!!! I just remembered something, Kev. I remember a sun-greeting when I was in the county clerk's office...you brought Dear Caesar Emeritus, Ptolemy the Gentle Boxer, and Cousin Eddie into the office and hid them in the closet. I believe you told me it was important they stay hiding there for a while...that you were playing a very special game of hide and seek, or something like that.
Yes, yes, that's the time! The time we accidentally invented time. We had to hide everyone from their other selves so that they wouldn't bump into each other. We were afraid they might explode in they did.
And so now I'm suspecting there were multiples of Dear Caesar and Ptolemy too?
Yes, yes there were. Thankfully there were only 4 or 5 sets of them though. But we sent all of them back to their proper timelines as well. I'm sure of that.
Wow, Kev...you really DO have crazy adventures! I thought you were exaggerating. Now I'm starting to think you don't have a problem finding your purpose--you have a problem KEEPING UP with ALL your purposes!
Well said, gorgeous Dee-Dee! Here, have some more kale chips. And Madeleine, I've just thought of an idea. Can you message me on the Casio communicator watch and ask me to come to Achilles' Last Stand? I'm going to hide in the bushes for a bit and see if another Kev shows up. We didn't have the Casio watches when we accidentally invented time, so it should be very telling indeed...if another Kev shows up.
Yes, yes, that's a good idea, Kev. Now hurry, go hide!
I'm not sure what sort of outcome I was hoping for. I believe I was mostly just cycling through lots of different possibilities in my mind. Broken pieces of thoughts. Anxiety is so inefficient, you know. I remained crouched down silently in the bushes, Dee-Dee the gorgeous Turtle upon my shoulder, my eyes fixed upon Madeleine's desk, Achilles' Last Stand. I was able to feel my heart beating in my throat...which is never a good sign for me. Moments went by and fluttered away--still no sign of another Kev. I briefly tried to convince myself that perhaps the problem had already fixed itself and there was no other Kev. Then Dee-Dee tried to convince me how foolish I was being for trying to convince myself of that. I thanked her for that.
Then suddenly a voice behind me...right over my shoulder only inches from my ear!!! An all too familiar voice!
Why are you guys spying on Madeleine, my beautiful gatekeeper? Oh, and why are there two of us here?
Both of me nearly fainted instantly as I jumped up and looked into my own eyes--for the first time ever..without the aid of a mirror. Dee-Dee the gorgeous Turtle spring-boarded off my shoulder when I jumped up, and she crawled away toward additional shelter as quickly as she could...in the event there might be a terrible explosion. You might have guessed, dear reader, that there wasn't any explosion at all, since I'm gratefully still around to tell you this story.
To be continued, in Part II
Thank you all for being a part of my journey.
Life is beautiful beautiful.
I love you.
I love you.
Kev
Kev
XX
Kev will speak in Purple
My beautiful gatekeeper, Madeleine, the Albino Peacock (Peahen) will speak in White
Kev with a turtle on his shoulder will speak in Orange
Dee-Dee the Turtle (upon Kev's shoulder) will speak in Blue
Both Cousin Eddie's will speak in Red
Olga the bartender fairy will speak in Yellow
Edwin the Bee will speak in the same Green as the general story-telling segments
So a final note before we get on with the chapter: if you're reading this chapter, it's likely you're reading it on a mobile device which means ALL the text will appear black with a white background. I will try to make the dialogue the least confusing as I can without using quotations. However, if you want to change this, simply scroll to the very bottom of the page and select "WEB" instead of the "MOBILE" that it defaults to. Then it will display all the text colors with a black background. To change it back again (if you have chosen to do so) scroll all the way to the very bottom of the page again (the very last line on the far right beneath the banner) and select "MOBILE SITE." Anyway, thank you all for being a part of this journey, and let's get on with the story!.......
My return to my Sacred Garden after a lengthy journey started out usual enough. Everything looked the same as I had remembered. My beautiful gatekeeper, Madeleine, was busy upon Achilles' Last Stand typing away on her laptop. Of course I should have known right away that something very strange was about to happen when I greeted Edwin the Bee upon entering, and He only chuckled at me. For whatever reason, that thought never entered my consciousness, however. I suppose I just chalked it up to Edwin being actually happy to see me again since I was gone for so long. Now that I type this, it becomes painfully clear just how foolish it was for me to chalk up such a thing! I can be very dense at times. *sigh*
Ahoy there, my beautiful gatekeeper! Beautiful as ever!
Oh, hey there Kev! I've been so wrapped up with these postings to the Andrew forum for the fairies, that I didn't even catch you sneaking past me! I see you've found a new friend!
Yes indeed! Isn't she gorgeous? This is Dee-Dee the Turtle. We found each other by the bank of my lovely sister the River just past the border to Flatlandia. She was looking for a purpose, and helped me to realize that I also have been searching for a purpose. So we just sort of hit it off right away.
Gorgeous indeed! It's nice to meet you, Dee-Dee. Kale chip?
Oh, yes! I love kale chips! Thank you. Mmm...delicious. You are every bit as beautiful of a gatekeeper as Kev said you were. And your sacred garden is even more stunning than I imagined it.
Well, thank you, gorgeous Dee-Dee. And welcome to our beloved Xanadu Forest. And Kev, why didn't you tell me about Dee-Dee before? You know you shouldn't be hiding your relationships from your gatekeeper...kind of hard to gatekeep that way, you know?
Well I just got here, Madeleine. I suppose I could've messaged you from the Casio communicator watch to warn you, but I didn't think it was so important that it couldn't wait until I returned.
But you said you found each other in Flatlandia. Even at your most motivated, which is not that motivated, I should add...you wouldn't be able to make it to Flatlandia and back in a single sun-greeting. A rabbit and a hare indeed, haha!
Who said anything about a single sun-greeting, beautiful gatekeeper? I've been gone for many sun and moon-greetings...as I would expect you to know. So many that I've lost count. And why are all the garden gate activity logs already signed off on? There should be a whole stack of them for me to sign off on.
I can attest to that, beautiful Madeleine...I've been traveling with Kev for at least a few sun and moon-greetings.
Is this some sort of prank, Kev? If it is, it's not funny. I've got a lot of work to catch up on, you know. The Andrew forums have blown up like crazy since the Fabupalooza concert in Lustra. And thank you for all the pictures you took for me, by the way. The fairies are so in love with me now! So can we end the prank now? And I can get back to the forums, and you can get back to doing whatever it is Kev's do when they're actually doing something? Please? And here, have a kale chip. Just made a fresh batch--lemon pepper with honey.
I swear, Madeleine, there's no prank here--or if there is, I'm not in on it. I'm at least as confused as you are, beautiful gatekeeper. Really. And mmm...these are delicious! Only YOU could get me to eat kale chips! Wait a minute!!!...did you say Fabupalooza?!! I haven't been to the Fabupalooza concert! I was waiting to hear back from Yana for when we would go. When did I supposedly give you pictures I took at Fabupalooza?
A few sun-greetings ago. Kev, something is seriously wrong here. Unless you're messing with me! I'm totally serious now, Kev...if this is a joke, you need to tell me right now. Because if it's not a joke, we have a major problem on our hands.
I can't swear enough...I'm thoroughly confused, Madeleine. Yes, something is majorly wrong here. This is so not good.
Do you guys think someone is impersonating Kev?
Either that, or something has gone wrong from when Tick-Tock Doc and I created a time machine and accidentally invented time. But we destroyed all the time machines and sent all the Kev's and Cousin Eddie's back to their proper timelines. Or so we believed. Either way, it's a really bad thing.
Wait!!! Time machines? Plural, as in more than one?!! And ALL the Kev's and Cousin Eddie's?!! And how come I've never heard of this incident? And boy, when you foul things up you really foul things up, don't you?! Exactly how many Kev's and Cousin Eddie's were there?
Honestly, I can't remember how many...but I think there were like 12 or 13 of us--each-- here in the Xanadu Forest...at its peak. It's a long story, but basically it happened like you said, Madeleine...when we foul things up we really foul things up. We realized our mistake right off and kept traveling back to a point before we invented time by accident. But we kept messing up, not realizing that each time we used the time machine, we were sort of copying and pasting another of us into our timeline. It was a design flaw...and that's Tick-Tock Doc's fault, not mine! Just saying. All this happened before you were my beautiful gatekeeper. You were just the county clerk when all this went down.
That sounds like a complete and utter disaster you had going!
Oh, you have no idea, Dee-Dee! Kev and his companions are capable of the most epic of disastrous situations. Wait!!! I just remembered something, Kev. I remember a sun-greeting when I was in the county clerk's office...you brought Dear Caesar Emeritus, Ptolemy the Gentle Boxer, and Cousin Eddie into the office and hid them in the closet. I believe you told me it was important they stay hiding there for a while...that you were playing a very special game of hide and seek, or something like that.
Yes, yes, that's the time! The time we accidentally invented time. We had to hide everyone from their other selves so that they wouldn't bump into each other. We were afraid they might explode in they did.
And so now I'm suspecting there were multiples of Dear Caesar and Ptolemy too?
Yes, yes there were. Thankfully there were only 4 or 5 sets of them though. But we sent all of them back to their proper timelines as well. I'm sure of that.
Wow, Kev...you really DO have crazy adventures! I thought you were exaggerating. Now I'm starting to think you don't have a problem finding your purpose--you have a problem KEEPING UP with ALL your purposes!
Well said, gorgeous Dee-Dee! Here, have some more kale chips. And Madeleine, I've just thought of an idea. Can you message me on the Casio communicator watch and ask me to come to Achilles' Last Stand? I'm going to hide in the bushes for a bit and see if another Kev shows up. We didn't have the Casio watches when we accidentally invented time, so it should be very telling indeed...if another Kev shows up.
Yes, yes, that's a good idea, Kev. Now hurry, go hide!
I'm not sure what sort of outcome I was hoping for. I believe I was mostly just cycling through lots of different possibilities in my mind. Broken pieces of thoughts. Anxiety is so inefficient, you know. I remained crouched down silently in the bushes, Dee-Dee the gorgeous Turtle upon my shoulder, my eyes fixed upon Madeleine's desk, Achilles' Last Stand. I was able to feel my heart beating in my throat...which is never a good sign for me. Moments went by and fluttered away--still no sign of another Kev. I briefly tried to convince myself that perhaps the problem had already fixed itself and there was no other Kev. Then Dee-Dee tried to convince me how foolish I was being for trying to convince myself of that. I thanked her for that.
Then suddenly a voice behind me...right over my shoulder only inches from my ear!!! An all too familiar voice!
Why are you guys spying on Madeleine, my beautiful gatekeeper? Oh, and why are there two of us here?
Both of me nearly fainted instantly as I jumped up and looked into my own eyes--for the first time ever..without the aid of a mirror. Dee-Dee the gorgeous Turtle spring-boarded off my shoulder when I jumped up, and she crawled away toward additional shelter as quickly as she could...in the event there might be a terrible explosion. You might have guessed, dear reader, that there wasn't any explosion at all, since I'm gratefully still around to tell you this story.
To be continued, in Part II
Thank you all for being a part of my journey.
Life is beautiful beautiful.
I love you.
I love you.
Kev
Kev
XX